This weekend we continued our REALationships series and I had the honor of speaking on REAL Parenting. If you missed this weekend’s message, I encourage you to watch it here and listen to it here. Also,if you were not at C3 this weekend, or if you would like to give your tithe or offering, you can give online by clicking here.
There is only one model, who has ever been perfect in history – and that is our heavenly father.
Matthew 5:48 NLT “But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.”
1. God understands me, so I must understand my children –
Psalm 103:13 “The Lord is like a father to his children; tender and compassionate to those who fear Him.”
We need to study and understand our kids. You cannot treat them all the same way.
Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV) “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.”
It is not a promise, it is a proverb.
2 phrases I want you to notice.
“Train up a child…”
How to communicate
How to have a quiet time
Having a good work ethic
How to clean the house
How to be a godly wife/husband
How to shop
How to eat and live healthy
Are you the one who talks to them about sex and dating
“The WAY he should go” – style, temperament, personality.
2. God accepts me, so I must accept my children.
Proverbs 14:21 “It is a sin to belittle one’s neighbor; blessed are those who help the poor.”
Children are a gift from God. God chose the gift you were going to raise. Accept one another as God accepts you. Accept them as a gift from God. When you don’t accept them you reject the gift God has given you.
3. God disciplines me with love, so I must discipline my children
Hebrews 12:6 “because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.”
If we don’t discipline our children it proves 2 things.
1. It proves You don’t really love your child.
Proverbs 13:24 “ A refusal to correct is a refusal to love; love your children by disciplining them.”
2. You are participating in their destruction.
Proverbs 19:18 “Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives.”
God never punishes His children He disciplines His children. Jesus took all the punishment.
Romans 8:1 “So now there is no condemnation (punishment) for those who belong to Christ Jesus.”
What is the difference between punishment and discipline?
Punishment – is to inflict a penalty on someone for what they did wrong. I am looking backward. Focus of punishment is on the past. The attitude of a person in punishment is anger.
Discipline – is to promote growth. I want to correct you, I want to train you, I want to make you a better person. Focus of discipline is on the future. The attitude/motivation of discipline is LOVE.
How do you discipline a child in love:
A. Calmly – Proverbs. 29:11 “Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.”
Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.”
B. Quickly – no one person should be the heavy all of the time. “Just wait till your father gets home.” It should be evenly divided between a husband and a wife.
C. Sparingly – Choose your battles. Don’t discipline children for being kids. Discipline them for rebellion.
Colossians 3:21, TLB. “Fathers, don’t scold your children so much that they become discouraged and quit trying.”
How do we parent if we have messed up?
We must admit when we are wrong. To say I’m sorry when you are wrong will elevate you in their eyes. Before honor comes humility.
Malachi 4:6 “He will turn the hearts of the Father to the children and the hearts of the children to the Father.” (Last verse of the Old Testament)
A church is only as strong as its families. We have to have Fathers turning to their children and children turning their hearts to their fathers.
If we can change a home…
We can change a community…
We can change a city…
We can change a state…
We can change a nation for the cause of Christ!
This weekend’s worship set included…
Not Ashamed – Passion 2012
One Thing Remains – Jesus Culture
Jesus Be the Center – Israel Houghton
The Difference – Hillsong
Nothing But the Blood – Jesus Culture